This one is a repeat from last time I did this, but it is so much bigger now. I can't even put into words how happy I am in my relationship with my wonderful God given husband. And yes I said God given...because I believe that he is definitely the man God had in mind for me all along. He has challenged me in ways that were perfect for my journey. By being able to witness and minister to him, it is causing me to be stronger in my faith and knowledge. I have to know my stuff to be able to have answers to John's questions. I know I don't always do my best, out of complete and utter fear....but I am still learning to be bolder about it.
Each and every day God brings us closer together, creating a bond that is unbreakable by anyone, a closeness that wasn't there in the years past, a newness that we just discovered this year (in our 10th year of marriage!), a wonderful affection that I can't even explain, a longing in his eyes that I haven't seen in a while that is loving returned everyday from me, an amazing love that grows with the rising of the sun.
I read something today that said you can't look for that complete unconditional love always in your spouse first. We are created to long for someone to fill that void...but the grind of every day life makes that near impossible with another human. BUT if you look to God first to fill you...you can in turn love your spouse in ways you never knew that you could. Because in those times when you don't feel like you can love them because of the "circumstances"...GOD makes a way, God fills your heart so that it can overflow onto your spouse. THAT is what I have found this year. That if I turn to God first, then I can love my husband that much more!
Here's the kicker to all of that...when I turned to God...he told me its not always the hubby, the changes have to start in me. And I thank God for turning the light on in my darkness, that even though it hurt to be exposed, now I can walk in the freedom of loving my spouse with everything God has placed in me for him.
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