I am so excited to receive my first blog award from my wonderful new friend Lynn today!
There are only two rules to follow after accepting this award and they are... 1. Confess 5 things you are addicted to.2. Pass the award on to 5 deserving bloggers.
SO let me think of the 5 things I am addicted to....wow! it's really hard to narrow it down!!
1. Praise and Worship - I love leading this with the children at our church. I can't even begin to explain how joy it gives me to hear them all singing HOLY HOLY HOLY!!!
2. Facebook- or as I more fondly call it "crackbook". It is horribly addictive!! I just can't stop!
3. Puffy Cheetos - all the salespeople at work know that if they want something from me....all they have to do to butter me us is bring me a Dr Pepper and a bag of cheetos (but not the crunchy ones, only the puffs)
4. Popsicles - this is a new one for me. I am desperately trying to lose weight. And I found out I can soothe a sweet tooth with a Popsicle that has only 40 calories and NO fat. YEAH!!! I just finished a HULK Popsicle seconds ago!!
5. Blogs (writing and reading) - I love seeing into people souls. You are more apt to write what you really feel, rather than tell someone. I strongly suggest everyone try it. Its good to get it off your chest.
Now to pass it on to 5 deserving bloggers..... Check this out and I promise you will be blessed!!!
I was listening to a teaching from Beth Moore this week (thank you Lynn!!) and the very first thing she said was "You Belong Here". Now of course she was saying if you were at that event, that God had you there for a purpose...to learn something, be touched by the Holy Spirit, be moved....have a moment with Him. BUT....it spoke to me on a completely different level. I had me a little holy ghost fit right there in the car. It made me realize....that I belonged in the moment where I was. I was supposed to be in this spot, in this place...doing what I am doing. God had it planned WAY before I was even born. He knew that I would face this...and would come out on the other side better!! He didn't say it would be easy....or fun....but I would come out better in some way.
I know that I am good at my job....but I am too quick to say "sure I can do that too" or "no, I don't mind" or "I'll take care of that too".....but its time to focus in....to buckle down...and do my job and not everyone else's!!! I am not going to be told that my job is not being done....because I am being kept busy with other things to do. I expect to have a very clear picture of what is expected of me....and also give them a very clear picture of what I am not going to do. One of those things is I am not going to be 5 years down the road and realize that I missed out on my children's life because I was always at work. They come first!!! Yes I have to have my job to support them....but they need ME there to support them too, not just my paycheck. I need a break....I am going to ask for a long weekend off to spend with my girls....please pray the favor of God on this meeting tomorrow....I don't want to say anything I will regret, but I don't plan on just sitting there and taking it either.
This I think has been the longest week in history....I am so confused about the next step to take....which way should I go? I have asked my husband what to do....I've asked my friends...I've asked my mom....I've asked my dad....and thursday, I am supposed to meet with my boss to see which way he thinks I should go...
But I haven't stopped to ask God which way He thinks is best. If He sits above and can see the whole path...beginning and end...why wouldn't I think to stop and ask Him for directions?? Because we like to think we can figure it out alone, don't bother God with my silly problems, I can use the brains HE gave me to figure it out. BUT...here's the catch...our teeny tiny brains can only process so much, can only see so much, can only understand so much. HE on the other hand knew this fork in the road would be in front of us on this day at this moment before we were even born. HE KNEW!!! So why not ask Him for the directions? Why not depend on His advice? Why not allow Him to help us....because He is sitting there waiting for us to ask.
He should be my refuge, my stronghold, my portion, my deliverer...so why not lean on Him???
Psalm 61:1-4 1 Hear my cry, O God; Attend to my prayer. 2 From the end of the earth I will cry to You, When my heart is overwhelmed; Lead me to the rock that is higher than I.
3 For You have been a shelter for me, A strong tower from the enemy. 4 I will abide in Your tabernacle forever; I will trust in the shelter of Your wings. Selah
Man...this morning at church was amazing!! There is no other word for it. Truly awesome!! OK, so maybe there is another word for it!!
I keep trying to start telling the story but I kept having to delete and back up a little more in the story to get the entire picture. So....I am typically not in "big church" first thing because I lead praise and worship with the kids. But this morning because of Tyler and I's dance...we were in the right from the beginning. At Breakthrough, we do declarations in faith each week as a body. There are wonderful. Because I am not usually in there...I had forgotten how powerful and amazing they are (I keep using that word today...AMAZING!!) We say things like "I put on the whole armor of God and no weapon formed against me shall prosper" or "I am victorious against my enemies" and "I am the head and not the tail" or "I will carry the spirit of this house in our businesses, our homes, our schools, and our communities"...I got all choked up right from the beginning this morning....I was worried that I would be too stirred up to dance....HELLOO!! IS there ever such a thing as too stirred up in God????
SO then it was time for Tyler and I...first she read Ecclesiastes 3:1-4....in a nutshell it says there is a time on earth for everything!! I tell you what this entire experience....and especially THIS day was right on time for me!!! I almost busted hearing her read that scripture aloud. It warmed my heart so much...to know how much this means to her...to see her grow in the Lord, to be excited to be at church and not feel dragged to church each week like most kids do. I was about to explode...and this was all before we even got started. As an aside...I love our church....our Pastor said to everyone one beforehand please don't sit down and watch...get up, get excited, even do a little holy dance too if you want to.....and everyone did!!! Everyone was on their feet, singing, and clapping and encouraging us....it was amazing!! (There's that word again!!) It was an incredible feeling....for 2 reasons for me....first I wanted everyone to see its ok to worship God with movement, in fact it is incredible!! 2ndly....I was so proud of Tyler...for putting her mind and heart to something and really going after it...she worked so hard, and you could see in her face that she really felt it too....she loves Jesus and praising Him. Again...I could have exploded...but it keeps going....
We went from that into Praise and Worship...which is always great at Breakthrough....but today, it was different, everyone seemed free-er (I'm not even sure that's a word) We sang "there will never be a friend as dear to me as you"....and the whole time all I could think was...the word friend does not even begin to explain it, it's not near big enough of a word...He is so much more than that. Friends can come and go...friends get into arguments....friends can still hurt your feelings sometimes....but He is so much more than that! SO much BIGGER! So much better!! Our last song said "I will praise the Lamb of God who sits upon the throne. He who was and is and is to come, I will sing before your throne forever" But my favorite is the second verse "all the angels sing and they bow down and they sing holy, holy". I have told the kids lately that there are angels that fly around the throne 24/7 just saying holy!!! I love any song that says HOLY....it gets me all stirred up. In fact I looked for the verse about this and couldn't find it....if you know it please let me know. So this particular goes into "holy, holy" and I just feel to my knees and thanked Him for everything He has done, is doing, and will do!! I got lost in the moment actually....then I realized EVERYONE was lost in the moment....God was definitely at Breakthrough this morning. It was amazing!! The Holy Spirit was moving through us all....so many were praying and worshiping. I can't even begin to explain the incredible feeling that was just in the air....
This is getting way long so let me get to the point of all this rambling....Nate started talking about going through the motions of church, being a member, doing the right things, but do you really know Jesus??? It stopped me in my tracks....its true, yes of course I know Jesus....but do I really "KNOW" Him? Do I have a relationship with Him? Is He truly IN me? The answer was no....I had let what I thought was a lack of time keep me from really seeking His face. I had some things from my past that were really bothering me lately...things I wasn't sure I deserved forgiveness for....then it hit me...I don't deserve forgiveness, but He gave it anyways!!! By the grace of God I am released from it, and redeemed from it. So...since He let it go, I have to do the same....I have to allow myself to stop looking back, and just move forward with Him. And God said to me to leave it behind, and that may mean leaving some of those people behind too...the ones that remind me of those times when I wasn't all I was supposed to be, the ones who try to keep you as "that girl they used to know".....that's not me anymore!! And thank God its not.
I still have some soul searching to do over this....but I am determined to seek Him more...not just when I need something from Him....but all of my days!
I am adding the link for this song that I talked about...let it speak to your heart today.
